The Things About You Both

1. You made us breakfast every morning from the first day of kindergarten to the last day of high school.

2. You chose to take crazy teens to Europe on your vacation time. Not once, but several times!

3. Every scar and hard time belongs to you because you got us through it.

4. The large educational accomplishments are 30% yours and 70% mine because you make me value it the way you do.

5. Your feelings don't get hurt when I ask you to stop rubbing my hand but keep holding it.

6. You were never asked, forced, or bribed into your role, you took it upon yourself and I feel so lucky.

7. I have your smile, eyes, hair, and boobs. I see you every time I look into the mirror.

8. I have your curiosity, tenacity, need for seclusion, discovery, and odd talent of making everything into a jingle.

9. You put my needs and aspirations before your own for years. I don't know selflessness like you do.

10. You are my best friend.

11. You taught us how to love our sisters.

12. You taught us to appreciate what we have, but strive for more.

13. We know independence because of you

14. If shit hits the fan, I call you and you will help me calm down and fix it. No questions asked.

15. When It comes down to it, I can't imagine my life without you two. I am completely certain if it wasn't for your constant devotion, getting in my business, and love, I would be a failure. My life is a testament to you, my life is yours. 

Happy Mother's Day to the best Mothers one could have.

Stagnation

I have the feeling as if nothing is going anywhere. My school, job, everything is on pause. Why? It might be because I have been on fast-paced auto-pilot for the last semester and now that it is over, life feels slow. Or, it might be that now that everything has slowed down, I am now able to understand just how mundane and blah my life is right now.

Fact: My job is going now where, literally. As of September, I have no job.

Fact: I still have one more grueling year of school that requires SO much time driving that I contemplate skipping and stopping by one of the several casinos I pass on my way down to my educational nowhere, called Lacey.

Fact: Boyfriend and I have the itch to move, do something more, but we cannot. Not because there isn't anywhere that interests us, but because we have NO money whatsoever to make us more happy with where we are. Everyone around us is moving on and up and we are stuck. Nothing bugs me more than two educated, capable, and motivated people without options because of money.

Fact: I want so badly to be successful and not worry about money. I hate saying this, but I would be so much happier if that was one thing I didn't have to worry about.

Final Fact: I am very, VERY blessed. I have people that love me and I love them. I have a home that is filled with laughter and kindness. I have two very adorable kitties that are the sweetest as can be. My family is glorious and life would be incomplete without them. I have constant love and support from Dave who is kind and respectful beyond words. My friends are friends that stories could be written about. They are tough, loving, and awe inspiring. I am lucky.

Stagnation sparks frustration, anger, and boredom. I am not ungrateful, just hoping for more.

When does the "more" begin?